Home Alone

When you live in a 6 bedroom house with 5 other females, you are very rarely alone. In fact, you are never alone. And even if you find yourself alone, its pretty much guaranteed that someone will be coming home at any second so don’t feel free to do “alone” things…like going potty with the door open…blow drying your hair naked…drinking your roommates milk from the carton…etc, etc, etc. So I find myself in a very unique position this Thanksgiving weekend. I am, for certain, the only roommate who is in Madison and the only roommate who will be gracing Bowen Court for the next 24 hours.

I recently signed a lease to live in a one bedroom apartment next year, which will be quite the transition from my current living situation. I have never lived alone before and depending on the time of day you ask me, I am either exhilarated or terrified. I see this weekend as a sort of “trial weekend” for what is to come next year.

There are some definite perks to being alone in a usually crowded house, so I have decided to list an account of things I am doing/have done while being alone. This is in an attempt to convince myself that being alone really isn’t that bad.

Go to the bathroom with the door wide open.
Shower with the door wide open.
Leave my shower caddy in the shower since no one else will be using it.
Sing. Obnoxiously.
Blow dry my hair naked.
Do anything naked.
Do a jig.
Check my phone for text messages every 4.9 seconds.
Watch any TV channel.
Turn off the TV and stare at the blank screen for 15 minutes when nothing is appealing.
Do accounting problems. Even though its Friday.
Do more accounting problems because there is no one here to tell me that it is okay to do bad things. Like not do my homework.
Open the fridge.
Realize I am eating out of boredom.
Close the fridge.
Order photos online (of the roommates I used to know).
Text my roommates to make sure they are still alive.
Stalk my roommate’s facebooks.
Wonder why, after all this time, the word “facebooks” still gets that red squiggly line under it, telling me its an incorrect word.
Wonder why “squiggly” doesn’t have a red line under it.
Think about doing laundry because the machine is for sure not in use.
Think some more about laundry.
Watch Game Of Thrones instead.
Blog and sing simultaneously.
Realize that’s nearly impossible.
Go back to just blogging.




Clearly things are “that bad.”

Come home friends. Lyss misses you.






About Melissa Faulkner

1. If I blog, someone will eventually discover me. 2. If someone eventually discovers me, I will become rich and famous. 3. If I blog, I will become rich and famous. Follow me for shorter, daily doses! @melisslyss
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One Response to Home Alone

  1. Lydia Faulkner says:

    This might be the best one yet !

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